My Relationship With…Attempting Love

I met my person when I was 16 or 17. However, I did not know he would be my person. He was a friend of a friend, was a year younger, and was in a serious relationship. Sure, I found him to be cute, and looking back, it looks like we had inside jokes on Facebook (when constant posting on walls was a thing); however, I never thought more about it.

I completely forgot about this person as life went on: high school graduation, college, failed situationships, potential career changes, and more. There may have been a like here and there on Instagram, but again, there was nothing more to it.

One night, in July of 2017, I must have stumbled upon his newest Instagram post and told myself it was time to shoot my shot. This was not planned. This was not something I was waiting for. I decided right then and there to just take a chance. A chance on what? I had absolutely no clue, but I was quick to say, “Hey! So, this is totally shooting my shot since we’ve hardly spoken before, but do you wanna get drinks sometime?” And here we are, a year and a half later. A year officially.

While I have taken the time to try to get to know myself better over the past year, I also have learned a lot from being with him: the good, the bad, and the ugly. However, at the end of the day, he has taught me, or at least has tried to push me, to be my best self.

He has taught me to be spontaneous (within reason).

He has taught me to love all parts of myself.

He has taught me that happiness is key, because what else is there to strive for?

He has taught me to question everything and start conversations.

He has taught me that going outside of one’s comfort zone is always best.

He has showed me that I am able to do the impossible.

He is my yes man when it comes to eating buffalo wings once a week.

He tries to learn all parts of me, from my Dominican culture to my diabetes to my quirks to my discomforts.

He lets me talk his ear off about things that he definitely is not interested but won’t tell me.

He has gone to way too many concerts with me since we began talking but has never tried to stop me from getting the tickets.

He asked me out in a Taco Bell because he knew my obsession was at its peak.

He bought my mother and I pepper spray with our neighborhood started to change.

He told me he loved me a few days into officially being together and has never once regretted it.

He has tried over and over again to get me to chill (“because not everything is the end of the world”) and has not given up yet.

He has made me excited to see how else I can grow and how far I can push myself.

I can go on and on and on; however, the rest is between us. Through thick and thicker. Thank you.

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